1
00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:07,560
Uh, excuse me?

2
00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:10,500
Could you tell me where the hoes are?

3
00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:14,640
Same place they were last week. Aisle
five.

4
00:00:16,620 --> 00:00:17,620
That was cool.

5
00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:21,720
Hoes.

6
00:00:25,620 --> 00:00:31,020
Whoa. Hey, Beavis, check it out. It's
Dog the Bounty Hunter. And that's Beth.

7
00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:32,820
His wife was a big hooter.

8
00:00:34,060 --> 00:00:35,340
Uh, dog.

9
00:00:37,480 --> 00:00:42,240
Yeah, I get that a lot, brah. Actually,
I'm a bouncer. We follow the same code

10
00:00:42,240 --> 00:00:45,940
as bounty hunters. I don't carry a gun,
and I don't do ice.

11
00:00:46,260 --> 00:00:49,160
Hey, Beavis, we should become bounty
hunters. Yeah, yeah.

12
00:00:49,560 --> 00:00:51,080
Get chicks and kick ass.

13
00:00:51,420 --> 00:00:56,060
Uh... Hey, how do we become bounty
hunters? Like I said, I'm not a bounty

14
00:00:56,060 --> 00:01:00,100
hunter. But I do know, if you go to the
post office, they have pictures of all

15
00:01:00,100 --> 00:01:01,300
the most wanted criminals.

16
00:01:01,540 --> 00:01:04,480
And if they're up there, they probably
most likely skip bail.

17
00:01:04,700 --> 00:01:08,320
And if they're skips, they've got no
constitutional rights, and you can pick

18
00:01:08,320 --> 00:01:09,700
them up and collect that reward.

19
00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:11,640
Thanks, dog.

20
00:01:12,419 --> 00:01:15,680
Hey, Beavis, if we're going to be bounty
hunters, we need to get a gun.

21
00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:19,900
Yeah, and leather pants. Oh, Dog doesn't
carry a gun. He uses industrial

22
00:01:19,900 --> 00:01:21,500
-strength pepper spray. I'll show you.

23
00:01:21,780 --> 00:01:22,960
Let's roll, Braz.

24
00:01:28,320 --> 00:01:32,800
This first part of the song sounds like
that music they play at the Olive

25
00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:33,800
Garden.

26
00:01:34,580 --> 00:01:35,580
Oh, yeah.

27
00:01:35,740 --> 00:01:37,420
Yeah, but then it kicks ass later.

28
00:01:38,920 --> 00:01:39,920
Yeah.

29
00:01:40,540 --> 00:01:42,600
The Olive Garden kicks ass, too.

30
00:01:43,300 --> 00:01:47,460
Yeah, yeah. I like to go there and stuff
my face with breadsticks.

31
00:01:47,860 --> 00:01:48,920
Because they're free.

32
00:01:50,520 --> 00:01:53,900
If you leave that place hungry, you're
just stupid.

33
00:01:58,220 --> 00:01:59,220
See,

34
00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:01,780
now this is the cool part of the song,
yeah.

35
00:02:03,260 --> 00:02:04,260
Yeah.

36
00:02:04,880 --> 00:02:09,180
Remember when you asked that waitress at
the Olive Garden to dance, and then

37
00:02:09,180 --> 00:02:11,750
she... Flapped you and the manager threw
you out.

38
00:02:12,610 --> 00:02:13,610
Oh, yeah.

39
00:02:14,350 --> 00:02:15,350
That was cool.

40
00:02:16,950 --> 00:02:20,070
She probably would have danced with me
because I have better moves.

41
00:02:21,030 --> 00:02:22,790
No, you don't. Check this out.

42
00:02:26,750 --> 00:02:29,950
Your move. Fuck, Beavis.

43
00:02:31,270 --> 00:02:32,270
Check this out.

44
00:02:43,320 --> 00:02:44,920
Dog was cool.

45
00:02:45,580 --> 00:02:47,660
He's really down to earth in person, you
know.

46
00:02:48,380 --> 00:02:50,960
Well, there's the pictures of the
criminals.

47
00:02:51,860 --> 00:02:54,480
We need to kick their asses and haul
them downtown.

48
00:02:57,340 --> 00:02:58,440
Look at him.

49
00:02:59,020 --> 00:03:00,600
Real scum of the earth.

50
00:03:03,540 --> 00:03:04,560
Excuse me, sir.

51
00:03:05,480 --> 00:03:06,660
Have you seen this man?

52
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:09,260
Any information can help, sir.

53
00:03:09,620 --> 00:03:12,160
And you can, like, remain anonymous,
too.

54
00:03:12,460 --> 00:03:14,520
Yeah, he's in Europe right now for a
summit.

55
00:03:16,700 --> 00:03:19,980
Damn it. Europe's, like, way over in
Russia or something.

56
00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:23,640
Whoa. Hey, Beavis, look at this.

57
00:03:24,140 --> 00:03:28,600
These fugitives look like wussies. Yeah,
yeah. We could probably, like, get the

58
00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:29,600
whole gang.

59
00:03:30,820 --> 00:03:32,020
Let's roll, Beavis.

60
00:03:33,060 --> 00:03:38,620
This is the place, Beavis.

61
00:03:39,190 --> 00:03:41,030
This is a pretty crappy school.

62
00:03:41,250 --> 00:03:42,250
Yeah, really.

63
00:03:42,330 --> 00:03:44,630
No wonder these kids joined a gang.

64
00:03:45,430 --> 00:03:48,130
So young. They had their whole lives
ahead of them, you know.

65
00:03:48,410 --> 00:03:50,190
But we still have a job to do.

66
00:03:51,430 --> 00:03:54,030
Yeah, a job to kick their asses.

67
00:03:55,430 --> 00:03:56,570
You ready, brah?

68
00:03:56,790 --> 00:03:58,350
Yeah, shouldn't we pray?

69
00:03:58,650 --> 00:04:00,910
Dog always prays before they chase a
skip.

70
00:04:01,190 --> 00:04:02,590
Oh, yeah.

71
00:04:03,790 --> 00:04:04,790
Okay.

72
00:04:06,010 --> 00:04:08,450
God is great. God is good.

73
00:04:08,960 --> 00:04:10,600
And we thank him for our food.

74
00:04:11,820 --> 00:04:14,420
Okay, let's roll, Beavis. On the count
of three.

75
00:04:15,260 --> 00:04:17,360
One, two, three.

76
00:04:20,220 --> 00:04:21,940
Hi there. Can I help you guys?

77
00:04:22,320 --> 00:04:24,480
You can help us by cooperating.

78
00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:27,600
Everyone turn around and put your hands
behind your back.

79
00:04:27,980 --> 00:04:29,860
Okay. We're in the middle of a class.

80
00:04:30,180 --> 00:04:33,140
You should have thought of that before
letting these kids start a gang.

81
00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:35,600
That's right, brah. Now I have to take
them downtown.

82
00:04:36,060 --> 00:04:37,060
We have no choice.

83
00:04:37,900 --> 00:04:40,820
Let this be like a wake -up call to turn
your life around.

84
00:04:41,060 --> 00:04:45,080
First of all, when you enter my dojo,
you pay respect by bowing. And second,

85
00:04:45,080 --> 00:04:46,120
keep your hands off my students.

86
00:04:46,460 --> 00:04:49,360
Uh, sir, I think it's best if you just
stand over there, please.

87
00:04:50,740 --> 00:04:53,660
Butthole. I don't want to have to kick
your ass, so you just step aside.

88
00:04:54,900 --> 00:04:58,340
Uh, okay, that's adding and a bit... Ow!

89
00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:02,160
Blast, allow me to demonstrate the
dragon attack.

90
00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:03,560
Ow!

91
00:05:13,160 --> 00:05:18,400
Well, hey, all those, like, crystal
things and those funguses look really

92
00:05:18,680 --> 00:05:19,680
Yeah.

93
00:05:20,280 --> 00:05:25,440
If nature looked like this, maybe I
wouldn't hate it so much.

94
00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:29,240
I hate the forest.

95
00:05:33,280 --> 00:05:35,620
White people.

96
00:05:37,540 --> 00:05:42,760
You know, I'm thinking, like, People
couldn't even get any whiter, and then,

97
00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:43,760
know, I mean, look at this.

98
00:05:43,980 --> 00:05:46,060
They are the whitest people I have ever
seen.

99
00:05:47,660 --> 00:05:53,460
I think this is music for, like, white
people that have never had anything bad

100
00:05:53,460 --> 00:05:54,460
happen to them.

101
00:05:55,060 --> 00:05:56,500
They've never had adversity.

102
00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:03,100
They decided to rebel against their
parents by making even softer rock.

103
00:06:04,780 --> 00:06:06,760
Don't express yourself too much. Come
on.

104
00:06:07,540 --> 00:06:08,760
These guys were like...

105
00:06:09,180 --> 00:06:12,380
That music in the elevators is too balls
-out for us.

106
00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:23,080
If you, like, cut out all the music and
then got rid of all these white

107
00:06:23,080 --> 00:06:26,060
people, this would make a really good
screensaver.

108
00:06:30,880 --> 00:06:35,280
Damn it, this sucks.

109
00:06:35,860 --> 00:06:39,130
We couldn't even catch any of these...
Damn it.

110
00:06:39,710 --> 00:06:42,370
I bet we could kick this guy's ass.

111
00:06:42,590 --> 00:06:43,590
He's old.

112
00:06:44,750 --> 00:06:46,930
You never should have jumped bail, Mr.

113
00:06:47,370 --> 00:06:48,370
Post.

114
00:06:49,430 --> 00:06:51,470
Hey, what did this guy do?

115
00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:55,990
Oh, he's the Postmaster General. He runs
the whole postal system.

116
00:06:56,590 --> 00:06:58,110
How the mighty have fallen.

117
00:06:58,750 --> 00:07:00,010
Go get him, butthead.

118
00:07:02,430 --> 00:07:06,350
I don't see him. Maybe he, like, skipped
the country.

119
00:07:07,240 --> 00:07:08,240
Wrong, Beavis.

120
00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:10,840
I got like a 20 on him.

121
00:07:11,820 --> 00:07:12,820
Check it out.

122
00:07:14,860 --> 00:07:18,300
Me. Are you sure that's him? Close
enough, Beavis.

123
00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:20,780
At least I bet we can take him.

124
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:24,040
Uh, Mr. Poth?

125
00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:30,380
Hey, Randy Lyle, that you a special lady
for.

126
00:07:32,020 --> 00:07:33,020
Remember?

127
00:07:33,900 --> 00:07:35,040
You're coming downtown.

128
00:07:35,360 --> 00:07:36,420
Come on. Downtown.

129
00:07:37,180 --> 00:07:38,320
Sounds like a party.

130
00:07:38,580 --> 00:07:45,400
We can do this one of two ways. We can
kick your ass or we can kick your

131
00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:46,399
ass.

132
00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:48,120
Downtown is a few blocks.

133
00:07:48,420 --> 00:07:52,700
Might be easier if you ride in my cart.
Tell it to the judge. Come on.

134
00:07:56,540 --> 00:07:58,480
Okay, we'll ride in the cart.

135
00:08:05,130 --> 00:08:07,430
This is the end of the road for you, Mr.
Post.

136
00:08:08,310 --> 00:08:11,710
We're taking you to jail. So, like, make
a left here?

137
00:08:12,210 --> 00:08:14,550
Jail? That's not an idea.

138
00:08:14,950 --> 00:08:16,390
Let's leap this one off.

139
00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:18,390
But the jail is this way, boy.

140
00:08:24,030 --> 00:08:27,270
Oh, there we go.

141
00:08:27,990 --> 00:08:32,750
Hopefully I got my regular cell. That's
the best toilet in the house.

142
00:08:33,190 --> 00:08:35,900
Eh. That's like enough lip out of you.

143
00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:37,240
Come on, move it.

144
00:08:42,620 --> 00:08:47,900
Hey, baby.

145
00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:51,180
We're bounty hunters.

146
00:08:52,680 --> 00:08:53,680
Check it out.

147
00:08:53,820 --> 00:08:56,040
Yeah, we have a fugitive and everything,
see?

148
00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:59,780
Look at him. But like, how about our
reward?

149
00:09:01,130 --> 00:09:03,370
You look like you have plenty of bounty.

150
00:09:04,510 --> 00:09:06,010
And booty, too.

151
00:09:06,710 --> 00:09:08,870
Excuse me? What did you just say to me?

152
00:09:09,110 --> 00:09:11,110
I'll have your butts kicked right out of
here.

153
00:09:11,350 --> 00:09:13,470
Ma 'am, don't make me use this.

154
00:09:14,670 --> 00:09:15,670
Damn it.

155
00:09:16,250 --> 00:09:19,210
Make it easier on yourself.

156
00:09:19,260 --> 00:09:23,810
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